Things have gone terribly wrong

In last night's dreams, I was running down the hallway from an abandoned building, Strange, twisted, and distorted faces screamed at me from the walls. I took pictures with my camera and they showed up in them. I tried to force myself awake. I was now in the middle of the woods. Disturbing creatures hung from rope off of the trees. Again, the pictures I took revealed the beings, so I knew I was still dreaming. I forced myself some more. Now I was back in the city. Hundreds of things looking like that circus Captain-Spaulding esque guy were approaching from all angles. The pictures I took still showed them. As I tried to force myself awake, they ended up directly next to me and started attacking with knives. At that point I woke up in my bed.

The thing was next to me, and now the camera wouldn't show him, but that means nothing anymore.

The pain I felt when I awoke was real.

The cuts all over my body were real.

And most disturbingly, the pictures I took in my dreams that are now on my camera are real.

I don't know what to think anymore.

There's a door in the wall. It leads to the city. From my dreams. I think this is my only way out. There are newspapers all over the walls in my room. They reveal a number of murders in my town that have apparently happened every time I've been asleep. All witnesses report the perpetrator to be dressed like someone from the circus. I know this is my fault. They happened when I was asleep, dreaming. I can't let this happen anymore. I've caused too much. This is getting too far out of control, as evidenced by last night's dream. I don't even know if I WAS dreaming. I don't know if I AM dreaming. I don't know, I can't take this anymore.

I'm going into the city. It may offer an escape. It may save me from these dreams. It may get me out of them. It may stop anything else bad from being caused by them. It may give me peace, finally.

I'm leaving now. Farewell.

Last night's dreams

I was running through the woods from something. I stumbled and fell into a pool of water, and when I emerged I was back in the city. I ran through it, running from nothing and for nothing. I came to an alleyway that I ducked into. On the walls, the words "You will soon be with us" were written.

I awoke.

I'm almost getting used to this.

Meeting

Meeting today went alright. We hooked up at a local restaurant and had something to eat while we talked. Young asked me questions about how long I've had weird dreams, how vivid they are, and how vivid the visions of the thing while awake are.

I told him the dreams have been going on for a couple months now, I've seen a psychiatrist and he told me to write a public dream journal after he couldn't figure anything out, and ever since then I've been updating this blog. I said that they were lifelike in how vivid they were, even though they felt completely impossible. He paused me to ask if I meant surreal. I shrugged and said maybe. I'm not too sure.

I told him the same thing for the "real" appearances. They seem perfectly vivid and and lifelike, even though if they were real it would make no sense.

He said that was enough, he was done. I asked him if he needed anything else and he said no, he'd just keep following this blog. I'll admit I was little pissed when he said that there was nothing he could do for me at the moment. Apparently, his organization is going to compare my responses with others, and keep following my blog to get the other info they need, although he said he honestly doesn't think it'll help much. My experiences apparently aren't "informative" enough to get good answers on the nature of this whatever-it-is from. He said the fact I'm seeing it while awake is interesting, apparently SMSC's never heard of that before, and he said that's why they'll keep looking at the blog, but until there's an idea on WHY this is happening they don't think they can get much from me outside of reading the blog. If they get an idea, he said, they'll meet up with me again and ask me about it and such. Ah well. He's left, and I'm heading home soon.

Last night's dreams were of me running around through the hotel, being chased by... something. Nobody else seemed to notice, they all stood directly outside their doors and stared straight ahead. I used the camera. They were there. I forced myself awake.

Gotta go, checkout is in 5 minutes.

Well, that was... interesting

Ok, I met with the guy at the hotel lobby. He ordered drinks for both of us and found a nice secluded place to sit. I asked who he was and what I was needed for. His response was... unexpected.

He introduced himself as Young, and said he works for a company called the SMSC. He told me he's been following my blog for a while, and that his company deals with similar cases. I asked him what the fuck this had to do with my job. He said his superiors at the SMSC are everywhere, and have absolute authority in most places.

I... may have gotten a little hot-headed. I screamed at him for a bit, thinking this was some cruel joke, the whole lobby was staring but I didn't care. After I yelled for a while, he asked if I was done. I said yes. He asked me to sit back down. I did.

He explained to me that the SMSC investigates certain anomalous entities that have been known to spread chaos and fear. They monitor the activities of these entities apparently hoping to figure out a way to stop them. From what he told me, there's been very little luck. They've destroyed one, but then two more appeared, he said. Although I think he also said he thinks the other two were just in waiting. I'm not sure. Don't really care.

He asked me if he could have another meeting with me tomorrow. Just so I can explain all that's been happening. He said after that he'd go back to his workplace and I'd be unlikely to see him again.

I told him maybe. I don't necessarily believe a stranger telling me this kind of crap. Then again, plenty of things have happened recently I have trouble believing. We'll see.

Finally Made It

Made it to the hotel I'll be staying at. Slept in the car last night, dreamt that I was driving down the road and that thing was sitting on my dashboard. I pulled over and took a picture of him, he was in the picture, I knew it was a dream. I looked up, and his face was stretching across the front windshield, smiling. His arms pulled across the windows holding the car shut. I forced myself awake. I looked around, and the roads were empty, but I still didn't feel safe, so I just kept driving.

This camera thing is really helpful already. I've seen him on the drive down a couple times, and proven to myself I'm awake with it.

Got a letter from the person I'm meeting today, just saying where the location is and all that stuff. He signed the letter "Agent Y.A.". Not sure what that could stand for, but ah well, screw it.

Welp

Didn't work. Not surprised, really. I took a picture of that asshole staring at me from the woods behind the house. He didn't show up in the picture. I lowered the camera and he was still there. Just wasn't in the camera.

Wait, I have a theory....

Ok, this thing's a product of my dreams, right? What if he only exists through my mind? I know he doesn't only exist in my mind, but maybe he uses me to manifest himself. That could explain it. I was seeing him because he was showing himself through me. Outsiders to this would not.

I need to keep my camera with me at all times, if that's the case. It'll tell me what's in my head and what's not.

Fits in with last night's dream, too. I was wandering the same forest, camera in hand. I kept taking pictures of him to prove to myself I'm not crazy. He just stood along the path and watched me. He appeared in my pictures in my dream.

Wait, that's it. That's fucking it.

I've been having trouble discerning my dreams from reality with this thing appearing. My camera can tell me. It can tell me if I'm dreaming or awake. It can show him or not show him. I have a way of knowing now.

In other news, I'm leaving across the country tomorrow for an important business meeting. My boss said some group who wants to review my recent job performance. He didn't seem to know much about it, actually, but said his superiors told him it's of utmost importance.

Anyways, I guess that's it for now.

Dreams and other bullshit

Last night's dream was getting disturbing again. I was in a cage, only able to stand and watch as hundreds of people around me formed out of a liquid flowing through the air. They would circle me, laugh, and then scream as the melted back into the liquid. That carnival bastard was there, of course. He's always there.

When I got to work today, my boss called me into his office. Apparently, I'm being assigned to some big out of town project or something. It doesn't matter. When I was looking out the window behind him, that shit was standing in the air, looking in through the window. He winked at me and he was gone.

I need to get a camera. I need to start getting proof of this shit. Maybe then somebody'll be able to help.

Saw Him Again

Saw him on the way home from work. Just staring on the side of the road. Bastard seems to be priding himself on my terror.

My dreams have been more and more mundane. Almost normal. That guy hasn't appeared in them at all.

I'm not sure which is the dream anymore.

Well, shit

I'm back. This didn't end. I was too fucking stupid to think something like this could just end. What was I thinking? Why would this just stop? Why would I be safe from this? WHY?

I woke last night. At 3:00. A.M. In my front yard. WITH THE FUCKING FUCKITY FUCKING DREAM MAN STANDING BESIDE ME. THE FUCKER JUST SMILED AND FADED AWAY INTO THE SNOW. FUCK.

I thought it was a hallucination, but there were footprints in the ground where he had stood. I got up, wiped the snow off of myself, and went back inside. I made a note downstairs. It was to see if this was real. If the note was still there in the morning, it was real. If it wasn't, it was a dream.

FUCKING NOTE WAS STILL THERE WITH WHAT LOOKED LIKE BLOOD SMEARED ALL OVER IT. THIS BASTARD IS MOCKING ME NOW.

I dunno. I thought about calling the police, but what would that accomplish? On the off chance they DID believe me, I doubt they could do anything about it. This doesn't seem to be something... normal.

Sorry about the breakdown in this post. I'm a little upset, as you can imagine. I've been looking over my shoulder all day. Searched the house this morning, but didn't find anything....

I'm still trying to figure out what to do.

Wish me luck.

I'm Still Ok

Hey, it's David.

I guess I just wanted to pop in to say I'm still alive and ok. The weird dreams seem to have gone away, I'm feeling good again, my life seems to be going back to normal. No creepy dude in dreams, no city, nothing. I don't feel unnaturally tired either. I think things are finally going my way.

I guess this is goodbye... I mean, if nothing else weird continues to go on, I really don't have a reason to keep updating this. So to the one person who kept showing concern and helping, thanks, man. I appreciate it.

If anything else happens, I'll let you all know.

Not much to say

Just woke up. Went to sleep a little past midnight last night.

Not much of a dream, either. The creepy dude was gone, but I was still in the city. I wandered around a bit. I just woke up.

Not much to say about it, really. Didn't seem as bad as they have been. Maybe this is near over. Maybe I'll be able to sleep like a normal person again.

Or maybe this is simply the calm before the storm.

Awake

Just woke up. I slept all day, although I suppose it's better than sleeping for two days straight. I feel a little bit more rested, although barely. I can still type, so that's good. Sorry about the chaotic last post.

Last night's dream had me back in the city. The Captain Spaulding dude was in front of me again. I asked him what he wants, and we had a short conversation.

David: What are you? Is this my subconscious?
CS: (Laughs for some time) My dear boy, of COURSE I'm not your subconscious. You'd think that would be quite simple to figure out. No, I'm much worse than that.
David: So what ARE you?
CS: I can't just tell you that, it'll spoil the fun later. You might find out in due time... if you survive that long.
David: What do you want with me? Why can't you just leave me alone?
CS: I want a good show, first and foremost. I want to see your fears. I want to watch you scream. You people always react in such interesting manners. It keeps me amused.
David: Why ME?
CS: That's what the victim always says, isn't it? Why me? Well, my friend, plain and simply because you were there. I had to pick someone. You were a person, just like the next. I just happened to decide upon you. That's why.
David: Fuck off.
CS: How rude. Do you have any kindness, any manners? I wouldn't speak that way to something that has complete control like I do.
David: Complete control? Of what?
CS: Of you, of course.

At this point, the figure disappeared and I awoke.

I'm going to try to go back to sleep sometime tonight. If I see that thing, I'll try to talk to it some more.

havent slept yet

tired feel like ive been up for weeks but i cant sleep i wont sleep i dont wanna see it again ive been p since last update too scared dont know whatll happen next whatll it show me whatll it do whatll i see

i cant stay up im gonna fall asleep and im scared whatll happen

that dude in comments said lucid dream control evironment and help change dream try that if i can

help me

please

Night 3/4/5? (Things Have Escalated)

So, you may be wondering why there have been no posts for the last 2 days. After all, this is a nightly dream journal, so nothing at all for two days would imply not sleeping at all for those days. Actually, my problem happened to be the exact opposite.

I just woke up from going to sleep two days ago.

I've called my doctor and he's claimed that this is normal, that most people experience this... yeah, I'm calling bullshit on that. I don't think most people sleep for two days straight, except maybe when they're infants or something...

I'm still going to say what my dreams where, because if I don't keep something consistent I think I'm going to lose my fucking mind.

Last night's (3 nights? I dunno) dream was another followup, but very short and simple. I was still in that city, although now I was running from something. As I ran, I found myself circling back around the city somehow- I would run in a straight line, and I would end up passing the same place 4 or 5 times. Eventually, when I stopped for a breather, this man stepped out of an alleyway. He was tall and gaunt-looking, almost corpselike. He was dressed like a carnival showman, almost like Captain Spaulding from House of 1000 Corpses, if that helps. He stared at me, silently, before uttering 4 words and fading back into the darkness, at which point I woke up.

Those words? "Let the fun begin".

I've never been so scared in my life. I don't know what that means, I don't know what my subconscious is trying to tell me, I don't know why I slept for 3 days, I don't know why it feels as if I've gotten no sleep at all.

I don't know what's happening.